asylum

if believin' wat I'm dreamin' means I'm crazy

institutionalize me; see you at visitation

better yet, at the liberation of your closed mind

your own fortified beliefs scoff at your strength, but don't kno mine

statuesque, n coatin' the skies over time

pickin' padlocks of possibilities, so i can go inside

lay claim to all i see

passions, destinies, anything i wanna be

while forbiddin' words said cold-heartedly from stickin' onto me

cuz I'm ever-changin', clean of eraser scratches n streaks

as the blood from my mistakes dry into a masterpiece

that will be when i look back n see my body of work

already creepin' from the tip of the brush, vaultin' to the verge

in fidgety, scatterin' bursts on assignment

to illuminate the purpose i been strugglin' inquirin'

follwin' the guidance these ink blots i call dreams are scribed in

knowin' this is where my inner peace is residin'

KG

scaled cheeks

Hurts me enough to cry but the fact is
Soon as they leave my eyes, the tears climb back in
Up n over the walls of my mind, makin em blacken
Before flashin the mishaps back to me
So bright, so rapidly
I tried to run but had no chance to flee
All there was for me to turn back n see
Was the anger I avoided, now trappin me
I jus wanted to get to a happier place
Til I got hit by this aroma I could practically taste
So sweet, it made me crash into the back if my face
But it came from a memory I had to escape
If it was possible-- its grip was comforting
But it made me someone I ain't wanna be
I thought I found an end to my woes in her smiling
But I'm reminded when the sadness falls, then starts climbing

KG

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'ring ring', a father's day poem

Hey dad! If you don't mind me callin' you that
I'd understand, but I mean you no harm
In fact
It bothers me none sayin' it, regardless of the past
I kno there is this forest of withered years dividin' us
And if anything has the right to survive in it, your title does
Tho its fruitless, n all dehydrated
I wonder if 'dad' means somethin to you when I say it
Never mind my courage to utter it, I'll show courtesy
Before admittin' your resistance to call me 'son' is hurtin' me
Because I'm a big boy now, n still risin'
From the naive depths, where my inner child is
Disquieted by you blind-eyein' him
Realizin', since I get no answer, I'll stop dialin'.

KG

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dropped call

We use to keep in contact
Til I came across the impossible, n said 'i want that'
Not the payoff that walkin down carbon paths recoup
But the enigma in the soil of uncharted avenues
That'll bruise the logic of scoffin attitudes
When they see my footprints, feel my promises for self
Gone astray in the wind carryin my despondent breath
Set free when I realized those weren't appleseeds in the ashtray
N the time I looked him in the eye, but didn't recognize my dad's face
I passed him by, until I heard my name,
Turned around
To the hurtful sound of immorality
Crashing on the floors upstairs that echoed domestic battling
Overturning my peace of mind, but not the trophy
Standin boldly at the end of this tunnel, glowing
Magically extracting me from the calamity
Thereby disconnecting me from reality

KG

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if I haven't missed it already.

Besides shipping n handling, it was a bargain
Bought in installments of me doin my part and
It would arrive at the precise moment
That was so far beyond my knowin
It made playful torture of the days passin
Strippin my ambition of its vision wit shady magic
How it would seem to be across the street, then lost at sea
And, in the same blink, be too odd to believe
If wat I'm expectin is really meant for me
Because I'm noticing my neighbors are gettin their deliveries
And rejoicing wit cheers that leave the air blessed
Enough for me to keep calm when I look upon my bare steps
To see no sign that they came n left
I don't kno-- maybe there are more payments left
Or the immensity of my desire is slowin the driver's truck
Either way, I'm hoping someday my time will come

KG.

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My Headphones

Peace in the water, war in the comments
Packed in torpedoes that target my island
Fired from submarines of the dauntless man
Too scared to cross the line drawn in the sand
Besides, they can't destroy or penetrate the sound
To reach the ears these rhythmic waves enshroud
Wit their backs to the world, takin me to another
When the lyrics drop, n intertwine wit my troubles
Makin my head bob, like I'm nodding in agreement
Even if they make no sense, I don't try to disbelieve it
Because its healin, bringin me back
Aiming me toward the peace I decreed to inhabit
When the havoc gets too loud, n I can't comprehend
If the racket's comin from the world or from within
Amid the instrumental BS-- I say nothin
I jus put my headphones in, n hit the 'play' button

KG

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The War

Patience frazzlin from the blatant mashin
On my buttons, til they get content, n jus stay jammed in
Muting any sound judgement, makin my reactions automatic
N turnin me into a walkin cannon
Fuse ablaze, aim rearranging speedily
Between the innocent n the guilty, there's no distinguishing
So I target the ground, hoping to keep this clean
For this planet is a formula wit enough malice
N its not my job to do the deed of addin
Tho the thought is attractive, I'm too distracted
By the sadness packed in my hollow tipped desires
Sharing the chamber wit my insight; I don't kno which will fire
Wisdom or censure; outnumbered is the former
My mind's winning this contest, but my heart's gaining on it
Cyclonic down its path to wake up my conscience
N spear through my madness in time to disarm it but--
(POW)
KG

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comedian

One day, from my castle's catwalk
Wit the city in my front lawn, the ocean in my backyard
Under unborn skies full of nostalgic stars
I'm gonna look back on these days, and laugh hard
At the b.s. sandwiched between the swipes of my time card;
The foolish thought of my career bein in this pipe yard;
The geniuses who disregard my intelligence--
Management, wanton women, the lesser men
The stepfather who did a poor job of steppin in;
All the apprehensive stares get a chuckle, too;
The angry words I swallowed-- they were tough to chew;
How I made it through the chaos to become a productive dude;
Without much ado, today will be tomorrow's punch line
Puncuating the foul sentence of woe that was life
Wit an accent so heavy in the hands of my grave ways
That it bends a smile out of my usually straight face.
KG

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dashed.

Fascinated, fixed on the glimmer
I was hoping the reflecting lights would form whispers
That would tell me wat it is Im tryin to figure
Not the shattered truth, but somethin upliftin
The debris covered an impressive distance
Far beyond any telescope's vision
And there I stood, smack dead in the center
Tasting every prayer I made in the lifeless air
That fled before me and the failure I exhaled
Paintin my ruins wit dim, coarse strokes
Awakening my sacrifices, shining through in morse code
Is this a blessing I'm readin in the picture before me
The answer to why my dream didn't finish its forming
Or details on the next direction I should go in?
This turmoil got me on my knees-- damn I put my life in this
Now I got a mess to clean-- do I trash it or recycle it?
KG

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The Entry

I've been writing, n I'm at my 1000th page
Because defining u takes as much time as it does space
There's jus not enough words or ways
For me to say not jus wat u mean
But how much-- you're so many things
In the hand of cards life dealt me, you're the queen
The thorn-less rose in the garden of love I walked through
Youre the soft touch my sore mind, body, n soul approves
You're the explorer that beat the task of searchin me
My audience when I feel the urge to sing
Even though I can't, you're my number one fan
Like you're my first choice every time I wanna slow dance
You're the eighth day of my week, a time for romance
That ends wit me holdin you like this paper holds my words
All through the nite, til the page is ready to turn
And bring a new day, a new page to think wit
Defining u is hard, and I don't think I'll ever complete it
Because wit every passin second, wat u mean to me increases.

KG

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Redefined

Loyalty. My lifestyle. My habit.
Not a choice for me, it's more automatic
Many throw hints but I never really catch them
All the thoughts of u, the memories we made, keep me distracted
Open. Nothing can stop this emotion's flowin
No person can block it, no flaw can slow it
Thats why we can talk about everything between the floor of the ocean
Around the fire our souls glow with to the stars the sky's holdin
Valiant. Theres no greater reason for battlin
My priorities shift because i have to win
Pride leaves the list, n ur well being moves up, past my life
Because I'm all for sacrifice
Endless. It's sewed into my pulse, I'm feelin it
That beat was almost nonexistent til u started remixin it
Something symphonic, tho I can't always make sense of it
The only way this track will change is if death switches it
KG

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Defining

L is for lonely
A soul searching for a sense of belonging
Wanting, by definition, to cancel itself out
Hoping out won't forever be without
The rest
O is for the obvious at it's sentimental best
A quest that ended way before it began
When for the first time 2 hearts held hands
V... V of for valid
Certainty, assurance and truth were checked on the ballad
When the body voted to understand
The auora, the miracle, under phenomenon that was happenin
E is for the emotion
Exponentially growing from the depths of my soul
Into a rose
The other half will forever hold
KG

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ring the bell

I banged on the dents from the inside out wit fists full of pride
For the bruises, forgiveness of self was applied
When I took a break between the bells to make sure I was revived
Cuz I been waitin in my corner for the next round, n its time
The fight's never been fair, exactly wat I had expected
But there are a few jabs I had no business acceptin
Uppercuts that should've never connected
N hooks that brought a pop that was beyond my perception
Few were deserved, some came while I was protectin
Many landed jus because I was present
I asked for many methods, used all except my own
Now I got this uninvited restlessness in my bones
And this logic that's huntin for a cure for this ill temper
A conscience nearly blind to the sympathy that flickers
In a darkness that seems to have no endin
And, in the center of it all, a redeemed heart shining wit a peerless crimson

KG

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Mirage

Wat is it when wats in the mirror is unfamiliar
A sign of declining eyes screamin for you to heal em
A broken mind havin trouble believin
Or the truth steppin out of concealment
After doin hard time, perhaps a decade plus
Is it returnin to fill in the space success ain't take up
I'm a leader, but to society's rules, I did plenty of following
Wit sights tainted by failures n contradicting philosophies
Constantly havin me mixed about who I should be...
I wanted to prove chivalry survived amidst the game love became
N now I don't kno wat should change
My direction?
Which side Im restin?
Im aware theres no room for handlin of the heart gone senseless
In the hour n minute hands that caress our existence
Where I'm the sore thumb, standin out
Waitin for a remedied kiss of identity from circumstance's mouth

KG

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the shake off

Can't curse the mirror for the reflection its revealin

It's not the fault of the echoing glass for the image appearin

For whatever problem there is wit wat you're seein

Is a sign that wats on the inside of you n outside of you are disagreein

I heard before the heart n mind speak different languages

One is wrong, one is right-- sometimes its hard to say which is which

Like doin the wrong thing, tho its feelin right

Or when you're ready to give in, but stay in and fight

And when your mission to stand out is accomplished

But you step in your cold-shouldered solitude thinkin 'i aint want this'

Wit half-way scaled mountains of dreams in your squinted vision

That makes your escape from reality a prison

I'm confined by my own ambitions, not as a form of discipline

But a recess in a world more believable than this one is

Where my identity is whatever craving inhabit my genius

Regardless the 6 foot perplexity the mirror has me seein

KG

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I mean--

In your dictionary, wats my definition
Sometimes i wonder if its there, or if its gone missin
Held hostage by a heartbroken history
At the ransom of your misery
At times distortin the joy you be envisioning
N rearranging the words my words when youre istening
To trick you into believin this isnt me
That Im jus another one of those thiefs
Who scratched the pain on the beliefs
The pages you tore out n trashed cuz to erase em or keep em
Made you sad, discouraged you to understand
I wanna be the hero of your heart, not jus your man
Tho im feelin like a villain out to prove my guiltlessness
While Im starin at this blank space, knowin you will fill it in
Dwellin in your affections' dictionary, I kno where I am
But does my meaning take up a page or jus a paragraph-- KG

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wildfire

The flames galloped wit a quick sprint
Leavin nothin in its shadow but imprints
Makin ashes of everything in me that didn't fit
N dazzlin all that is significant
Like the style of my love, a signature in cursive
Vindicated on the hearts, some souls who've earned it
To preserve them from this scaldin marchin
These adverse times have brought upon me
Without warning... made my vision smokey
This rollin fog shows the unknowing me
Maybe holds who I'm supposed to be
Standin in this glowin heat
Heroically embracing this destruction in me
To save my faith hope n love from ending
Because when the steam from the embers is done ascending
I wont be who I was in the beginning--

KG

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cannons and carnations

If asked I wont shy away
They can take their shots-- it wont die away
I'll take the blows, still look em right in the face
N speak wat I have the right to say
Such a delightful phrase, this three-petal rose
Many attest to know, but never get to hold
Because they wont let it grow in their garden, hardened wit
Soil soaked wit pride, seeds of fraudulence
In a deceitful harvest that'll bear bitter blossoms
Clever corsages, not this boastful bouquet
Sprinkled wit aromatic affections most wouldn't say
But she has this alluring way, wit her commanding eyes
And magic smile that makes everyday Valentine's
I've grown bulletproof to the taunting, I let nothin through
So I can speak it wit courage n purpose, because its true
The claim I've made infinite times, plus two
Holdin the flowers like a mic-- I hope you hear me: I love you

KG

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frontline of aspiration

I’m jus a warrior searchin for his battlefield

Covered in wounds of failure that havent healed

Each chance taken graduated to a scar

Those mighty matches n crucial clashes, numerous and far

From ground zero of my soul n through the stars

Left lacerations from miscalculations

N gashes made from my needy hand negated

I prowl wit closed fists n a bare imagination

Sharpened by faith n hope for my next engagement

Wit decisions difficult to make when

I carry my morals wit a mind corrupted

Wit hardships that mute my opportunity’s thumpin

That doesn’t amplify the tune of my heart but muffles it

In a world im stuck purposeless in, my fuse a retracting string

Curving down wat I hope is the path for me

That ends at my desire, somewhere outside reality
 
KG